Keeping it simple

What Seems to Be, May Only Be but Just a Seems

I'm so happy you have enjoyed the travelogue postings. I know that the energy of those pictures hold a sacred energy not only for you but also for me.

This undertaking while brave has also been a leap of faith for me. I'm in a world I used to only visit, dream about the next trip, and fantasize a romantic opportunity. Yet how did I get here to this moment in time? How can you get to your moment in time?

Eighteen years ago I came here out of desperation. Divorced 5 years, having just experienced the death of my son, and lost to what I thought was my spiritual path + a dark night of soul I wouldn't wish on anyone I discovered that a dream, a land, and trauma could bring healing if allowed.

Yes, Ireland is amazing beyond comprehension, yet so can Mexico, Japan, France, Norway, downtown Boston, and the Badlands be amazing and transformative. It's not only the land that leads to transformation + realized dreams. All of these desires hinge on our willingness to look ourselves straight in the eyes, heal + own our trauma, embrace our darkness, bring forth our true + honest desires, and LISTEN to our deeper soul guidance.

It requires an honest assessment of our wants that have been suppressed, willingness to own our shit, and the ability to embrace your bodies desires. Now I'm not talking about carnal desires, although they shouldn't be dismissed or overly awarded, I'm talking about our reluctance to Get In Our Bodies and feel this life. The land we walk upon can only support us as deep as we are in our bodies. One can flit across this lifetime, barely feeling the pain + joy, all one wants. If your desire is to truly embody your moment in time then it is best to feel all of the emotions, pain, and ways in which you sabotage yourself. It may not seem like an easy road, it may seem unsurmountable, it may seem like perhaps next life, and all of those Seems are valid. They are also easily discarded.

I've owned many of those Seems. I've also discarded many of them only to have other Seems appear. Even now, living here on my soul land, I have them arise in moments I wish they'd just dither away. The bottom line is the Seems will never disappear. The right now will never arrive, the perfect setting will never arrive, and it's ok if you hang around just like you are now.

There is no scorecard like we've been told. There is only you bringing into your life what you desire, then tossing it aside while you bring what you truly deep down soul desire. Life has its societal timelines. We all have children to raise, parents we care for, jobs to fill, debt to be erased, and mortgages that strangle. We all also have a soul that guides (at times it may appear our soul doesn't understand 3D reality timelines but if we connect deeper it does), perceptions that are false, trauma to heal, and ample room to balance life + our soul path.

What I am trying to say is - this isn't an either or game.

Life is a weaving. It's snags and missed stitches. It's a beautiful tapestry filled with all your desires, missteps, bottomed out moments, achievements seen + unseen, and fuck it I don't want to go this deep moments.

I honestly don't perceive what I have just done moving here to Ireland as mind blowing. Maybe I should. Maybe I should really let this decision rock my socks. Maybe I should own this all the way down into my bones. I haven't. In some part of me it just seems normal. I must make sure I'm not denying myself the thrill, the joy, the painful, ecstatic feeling of OMG because that self expression was squashed at age eight.

Hmmm perhaps I've got a Seems. See we all have them and we all have the ability to see them, own them, and send them on their way.

May you always feel deep.

May you always love you.

May you always give others a pass on their Seems. May you one day realize there is no timeline.

May you always leap.

May your Seems just be Seems and never deterrents.

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The Prelude .....

I love the word Prelude.  It speaks of such beautiful anticipation.  It lays the ground work for the masterpiece.  In music it sets the stage for the grand suite or fugue.

In the aspect of your life it offers so many options, tweaks, and creativity.  It is the juiciness of design, the excitement of the inspirations, and the core of creation.  Your aspirations shine during the prelude leading further down the path. Prelude can take many forms and speaks to your psyche as to the process that resonates with you.  

For me sometimes it is the prelude where I get stuck.  Do I approach the Prelude this way or that causing me to not allow the flow  I am not one to be uncomfortable for long, either a solution appears or one must move on. So over careful reflection, I have come to understand that Prelude is not to be rushed. There isn't a time limit to its creation and when allowed to flow guides itself. Prelude is not the incubation period. It is the creative introduction, the stage setting for the Masterpiece. Creating the Prelude is as valuable as the masterpiece itself.

As another marking of time begins what will be your Prelude?  How will you approach your masterpiece? Will you give yourself permission to flow into the anticipation.  

Is discovering your muse, your prelude without linear time important to you? Giving rise to understanding that time does not control our outcomes removes suppression of our soul song line. We are so geared to time limits in our daily life that we often rush to push our creative work out into the world too soon. Does your new healing modalities or creative offerings have a self imposed expiration date? Is the launching date driven by the world at large or the panic of missing the prospect of joining the bandwagon of others?  Are you listening closely to your Soul Song line and imbuing your Prelude with soulful creative energy allowing it to steep?

It isn't unusual to feel the push to get your creations out into the world 'just in time'. If you watch a true creative person they move differently. They listen intensely to a different drumbeat that draws their creations along. If you ask them they will do their best to explain how they create. Just remember it is how they create, their soul song line they hear and follow, not yours.

2017 is a 1 year in Numerology. A #1 year is all about new beginnings and the energies of #1 are perfect to begin your Prelude.  Astrology is another modality that speaks of cycles and spirals not linear time.  The movement of the Stars are very much a symphony.  They take center stage on cue, moving forward or retrograde back to a repeating stanza. 

Your soul doesn't do linear time.  Your soul doesn't do human.  It does soul.  It sings a song that flows and swirls.  It doubles back, surges forward, pauses, and plays. Its time rhythm is to visualize, listen, and dance.  Soul song lines have no beginning and no end. They just are truly movement. 

We live in a linear society so how do we walk in two worlds? There are many tools available to support you in straddling many worlds. Check your toolbox and see which work best.  Reach out for new tools or a refresher course. Play with your old tools in new ways,  Play and build your Prelude.

How does one connect with your soul song line? Hum a few bars, sway a bit, 2 twirls and a sigh should just about get you there .... Come play with me and I'll help you hear your soul song line.

Happy Fresh Beginnings! Come play with me any Time xxoo

Traveling on ~ The Soul Traveler

Time and Time and ..... Time Again

"Make me your friend," Time whispers.  "Don't hate me for not filling your day fuller, or so full you can't breathe. Remember I am but the limits you believe exist."

We wander through life following a clock.  We are taught to set goals for the future and remember the past.  We are not told how to live in the present.

Time is presented to us as a dictator.  We are led to believe that we must rush through our life succumbing to its will.  The sound of our mother's heartbeat from the womb is replaced by the tick ticking of an inanimate object.  Driven by a set number we rush through our life only occasionally rebelling against its chains.  We think Time requires us to be lead around in a constant circle.  

We practice meditation daily only to run off to the next appointment we managed to squeeze in to yet another day. How often do we purposely bring the non-time of meditation into our work day or weekend plans?

Each of us has our own perspective of Time.  We use it to accomplish our living, mark memories or milestones, and allow it to lead us forward.

Time does not exist.  It is our buy-in to segment our life that determines its control.  If Time doesn't exist then what does that really mean + why would we care?

Our ancestors used Time as a natural rhythm.  Sleep + waking were the determining points.  The sun came up, they rose.  Sun set, they slept.  As days lengthened hunting + planting lasted longer. Days shortened hunting became a quick sport and they relied upon what harvest came from the plantings of the longer days.  There was not a giant clock nailed to the trees, ticking away to drive their days.  They marked their lives from the seasons and rhythms of the sun + moon.  The stars portended the future.  The moon reminded them of the day just ended ~ the past.  Their present was marked by the sun as it moved across the sky.

Now we live here with the aspect of Time glaring down from his mighty perch, barking out measured steps to be completed each day.  Our children's arrivals are measured in weeks, the longer calculation, instead of the vagueness of months.  There is a celebration for every passage of time.  Constantly we are shown the greatness of Time.  A languished moment is heralded with criticism and offered up as a treat.

How we got here would be another 10 pages.  How we arrived is not as important as how we release this dependency on Time.  We can all agree we are in a world running faster and faster.  We are totally enmeshed in the barbs of time.

Each of us use some form of meditation.  These practices are generally our first introduction to moving out of time. As we leave our meditations we sense the calm space, an altered space, surrounding us and it appears to be drifting away.  You experience this same sensation when you are caught up in something enjoyable and not so enjoyable.  It is the altered state of full immersion into the Present that lengths or shortens our concept of time. Time truly is an illusion.  Playing with that illusion will break down the mental and physical constraints.  

Try for 45 days a few of these games and see what transpires.  Nothing tricky or 'time-consuming' to this play.     Enjoy ~

1.) Rid yourself of all clocks. Yes turn your phone over :)

2.) Each traffic light you approach that is RED state: 'Change, change, change'.  Make note each time it changes to green.

3.) Each traffic light you approach that is GREEN state: 'Stay, stay, stay'. Make note of the times it stays green and you pass on through.

4.) Using the appointments you have during a week, pick one each day (even if the only one is getting to + from work) as you head to the appointment say, "Stretch, stretch, stretch'. Make a note when you arrive with time to spare and when you don't.

Each week during the 45 days review your results.  Mark down any feelings or reactions recording when one was easy, fun or difficult.  Note any resistance.  These simple exercises will asset you in learning how to stretch time, fold time, and break down the assertion that Time exists.

Learning to play will help shift your mind & its reality of the need for time and heighten your bodies acceptance of freedom.  Time play + shifting = a mental, physical, and spiritual understanding of what is reality.

Traveling on out of time ~

Teri ~ The Soul Traveler

Quiet or Quit ???

It has been quiet from my voice or have I quit?

I have been absent in the sense of the expected.  I have not been absent or quiet from the yearning, the learning, the living. Oh not at all!

Not being one who harbors unresolved explanations of the current situations to the extreme (HA what a mouth full) but one who tires others in my constant reflection (welcome to a Pisceans world), of how best to be, I must admit that the world carries on without us.

Like all of us I have been involved with the daily aspects of living.  Gratitude abounds for the myriad of interactions in my day.  Be it work, supporting clients, training for a 1/2 marathon, or the necessary gathering of food, bills, and housing, my day is often beset with distractions.  Being fortunate that alone time makes up most of my day, I can reflect upon the different ways to enrich my life.  

Growing up I would become overwhelmed quickly with any task that required complicated explanations of how to go about completing them.  In other words, I would go TWILT with too much sensory overload.  The simpler the explanation, the cleaner the directions, the quicker I accomplished the necessary steps and moved on.  I was besieged in school with the label of 'lacks the ability to follow directions'. Perhaps to them but I got everything done. Maybe not how they viewed it should be but I completed the requirements none-the-less.   

I had thoughts of quitting.  Silencing my voice so I fit in the crowd.  Giving in to the demands to do it their way to end the overload. What happened when I ventured to be just one-more female? It suffocated me and drove me to shrivel inside.  It left me frantic. I spent more time away from people, taking my introvertism deeper.  I wasn't happy and I began to dislike myself.

Without realizing it, I found ways to deflect the constant desire by the nun's and other adults for me to mold myself into their idea of how a young girl should be in the world.  It took me many years to learn that outbursts, no matter the reason, were not allowed in school, home or church. I found my escape outdoors. Creativity was flush out there away from the demands of the 'adult' world.  Over time I learned how and when to share my outbursts.  Slowly I discovered my way of being in the world.

Did I set out purposely, with a 10-point plan to recreate my world as it existed?  Can't say early on that I consciously did.  Because I was young and I listened to the sweet quiet voice that still spoke to me, I found I could sometimes boldly stepped forward.  When I couldn't hear the sweetness from my fear I became meek and frightened.  Whatever the situation, I moved forward, I never quit moving often swallowing my fear but moving just the same.  I might have been quiet, but there was a resoluteness to my daily step, a stubborn turn of my chin that rode on beside me bringing me to adulthood.

When you reflect upon your childhood, do you take the time to notice the courage, the desire, the divine spark that rested deep within you?  Or do you only remember the 'good' times and the 'disappointing' times?  Can you peak a little deeper into those moments?  Are you willing to honestly see the mixture of wisdom and cavalier spite? Try not to dissect to the point of no return in your reflection.  Do take the time to sift through the illusion of childhood.  Upon closer inspection is great wisdom working beside you to develop your soul path?  

We are not innocent bystanders in this journey.  We are constantly co-creating for our higher good.  Some of our creations we think may lack a bit of substance and appear to be better suited to the junk pile.  Look closer!  There is wisdom and empowerment in failure.  Take time to deeply reflect upon your childhood memories.  Yes there is sweetness but what else?  Can you see the wise one deep within?  Is what you remember after reflection useful today?  Have you forgotten that the connection you felt so freely to your divinity as a child is still accessible?  Can you bring that child's knowingness of their divinity to you today?  Take a moment and go back to that time when you knew without a doubt and reconnect.  Embrace you in that moment.  Give them a seat at your table.  Allow them to show you why they never doubted.  Laugh with them and feed your divine spark.

The stubborn turn of my chin has been a cornerstone to my soul path.  That stubborn marching child, refusing to give up her will, has walked me through many harrowing experiences, and allowed me to meet some of the most amazing souls this lifetime.  I can guarantee you, she ain't going nowhere soon!  How about you?

Oh the joys of ...Traveling on .....

Teri ~ The Soul Traveler

 

 

The Listener .....

We all know them.  Some of us may be them.  Those who are artists at listening.  Super great at just knowing your faces and phases.  They seem to pop out of nowhere saving you in the nick of time.  For the listeners they can't explain in words how they did it nor even why they do it.  It is just something that is an intrinsic part of them.

When you are the listener, you seldom ask why me. I doubt very much you even consider looking to see if the scales get balanced.  The ability to sit and truly listen is a work of art.  To sense the immediate need by another to be seen right then and there is a blessing to so many.  Always feeling to them their value and ability to scale any difficulty helps to settle the world.  Sensing the way through the trees into the open comes very naturally and you help them glide past the rough patches.  Those who come to be heard leave refreshed and peaceful.

Without the Listeners this world would be chaotic and devoid of nurturing.  So sometimes when you are being heard think how much the Listener could use an ear.

And Listener, sometimes your voice needs to be heard.  xxoo

The Balance is set again.

Traveling on ....

Teri ~ The Soul Traveler

 

The Onion Skin ..... Whew!

We have all been at this game a very long time plugging away at the wounds and fears that have culminated over many years and many lifetimes.  When I first pulled the brake on the merry-go-round, I went in search of ways to release the wild woman in me.  I went searching for a way to stop the continual repetitive nonsense that occurred in my life.  I went in search of the tool to help peel the onion skin we call life.

For over 20 years I have peeled and peeled away my fears, ego-driven decisions and patterns, + my wounds.  Early on after a major shift and healing, breathing a sigh of relief, I would erroneously think I had finally released it + life would be grand.  Eventually I realized that my onion had many layers. HA!

Seeking help for the abuse from my teen years from traditional + non-traditional modalities, large pieces were discovered, healed, and released.  I understood it would take time to find my way through the wounding.  I embraced each opportunity.  As all of us have I experienced my fair share of wounding..  I can't say mine has been any worse than anyone else.  What I can say is I sought healing.  I dislike feeling wounded.  I like feeling alive.

When the brake was pulled and I woke up to the fact that I was so much more, my deeper sense showed me that healing had to take place on all levels.  The levels of mind, body, & soul.  Healing only one aspect of me wasn't deep and true healing.  If I left the body out it would flair up later throwing a wrench into my life.  My mind, well it's cunningness would just plain shut the whole plan down.  My soul led the charge so I always knew where it stood!

Naturally I have always tended to my body, watching its reaction and cradling it in self-care.  Broken bones were very minimal.  I trampled over soccer fields, scaled trees, lifted poundage few can, and danced till dawn.  Sure there are times I wondered why I needed an extra 3 hours of sleep, or the extra body fat lingered longer than I wanted, but I never thought my body wasn't magnificent.  Self care of this amazing gift was easy, delightful.  Now she was screaming and I couldn't find the secret.  

About a year ago, I began to experience strong pain in my hip area.  My ability to move or sit & stand for long periods was significantly hampered.  Cursing my age and refusing to succumb to the charge of "this is what happens when you get older" I sought support.  My pelvic area was screaming daily!  I have a very high pain tolerance so when I say screaming, well I think you get it.  Determined I searched for relief.

Finally ~ I discovered a way to release the muscles around my pelvic bones.  I started with exercises while I searched for a rolfer and physician.  A doctor came on the scene eventually.  She was my first experience with a Doctor of Osteopathic Medicine.  I was actually touched for 45 minutes not just once but 3 separate sessions.  After that amazing experience I walked away with relief and an understanding of the physical root cause of my pain.  This is a lovely story but what does this have to do with the Onion?

For over 3 weeks now, since starting the self-care of my body, every wounding around this area, wounding that has been there for over 50 years came bursting forth.  The muscles screaming was the pain long held so tightly.  My muscles vowed that they would hold that pain so it could not hurt me and assure no one could see it.  The pelvic girdle was my armor.  It absorbed the abuse, the traumatic birthing of my son, the wild woman wounding, and grabbed everything that threatened my heart.   The Onion had burst upon the scene demanding to be picked and devoured.  

The race was on to bring the healing to the deepest part of me.  Things I had not thought of for ages surfaced during the day and especially at night.  My nighttime travels were halted.  The stars came in force, the guides suited up, and tackled, snuggled and down right knocked the wounding out of the ball park.  Driving in rush hour traffic in a town of 65,000, I found myself yelling at them to move taking myself back to years of Denver + I-25 traffic only to realize another layer was asking to be peeled, that layer of feeling out of control.  I know I am not in control of the outside world.  The red flag had surface and off I went to heal the wound that was asking to be seen.  Exhausted from the pain, I sat one night allowing the tears to form, suddenly a hummingbird sat beside me on the trellis, releasing two streams of nectar, turned to look at me and flew away.  Healing surrounded me.

A long time ago I learned that healing for this lifetime won't be done by any certain date.  Healing takes times.  Healing is self-care.  Healing is being the wild woman.  What I can do is minimize the wounding.  I can heal whatever comes now quickly.  The wounding is no longer buried out of fear and misunderstanding.  At times the wounding becomes a grand experiment.  Like a bug under the microscope I love to dissect it, watch to see what works best to heal, and discover the inner wealth I hold to bring forth my secret cure.  Is the cure recognizing my worth, who I am and how I am in the world, or is it something as simple as a smile and acceptance?

Life is filled with adventures.  None of them are better or worse.  All of them draw us closer to who we are and our purpose.  How we react to them creates the wounding or the empowerment. Learning to peel that onion with all our tools frees us up to enjoy our life fully.  

My tool bag is always packed.  How about you?

Traveling on - The Soul Traveler XOXO